This I Believe- Pain and Stuggles Make Us Stronger

A defining moment in my life was during my junior year of high school. I was having pain in my knee, and it wouldn’t pop back into place like it usually did. So I had to go to the doctor, and he told me that I needed crutches. This was the beginning of a very long, tedious and painful experience for me. I hated crutches, mostly because I couldn’t do a lot of things for myself. I am a very independent person, and so when I needed someone to carry my books for me, or open a door, it wasn’t very easy. But I kept telling myself that it was only going to be for a few weeks, and that my 3 times a week physical therapy sessions would make me better.
But they didn’t. Actually, it made my knee worse. My doctor hadn’t wanted to do surgery, but he said that I would need a minor one. I wasn’t looking forward to that. I didn’t want to miss school and have a scar! But he assured me that it was a small surgery, I wouldn’t miss a lot of school, and that it would be a small scar. About a month later, my knee was not any better. It hurt all the time, no matter how much medicine I took. My doctor told me that I would need 3 surgeries, a major one and 2 smaller ones. I was so angry. I remember when he told me, I was on a balancing mat and throwing a ball at a trampoline for my physical therapy. I threw the ball so hard that when it came back, it knocked me of the mat. I started crying, because I knew that my knee was horribly messed up. I was scared, and felt helpless. I was used to being able to fix things on my own, and I couldn’t fix my knee!
My surgery was set for May 11, 2007. The week leading up to it was the most nerve racking of my life. I was terrified that they would make a mistake, and I’d wake up to find that my knee had been amputated. My doctor prescribed me medicines to take to calm me down, because I was so nervous. They didn’t help, and the day of my surgery I was a wreck. As they put the IV into my hand, I was screaming and crying. My mom held back tears as they wheeled me away to the operating room.
Hours later, I woke up and felt a horrible pain in my leg. I looked down and saw a huge brace that went from my mid thigh to my ankle. It was tight, itchy and very uncomfortable. All I wanted to do was get some more pain killers and go home. I was only supposed to spend one night in the hospital, but I ended up staying for a week. There were a lot of complications, and I almost needed to have emergency surgeries. I was so scared. It was the hardest thing of my life. I couldn’t leave my bed for 4 days, and using a catheter and a bed pan was one the most humiliating things that I have ever experienced.
When I finally got to go home, I was ecstatic, but in extreme pain. I ended up having to go back to the hospital for another night. Using a walker was very hard for me, because honestly, what 17 year old girl wants to be using a walker instead of going to prom? I sure didn’t. I ended up missing a month of school, and I had to make up my school work in a week. I finished all of my work, and did my finals, except for clay work. I was very proud of myself, because I worked very hard, even though I was in a lot of pain.
I often find myself wondering why this happened to me. Why did my knee have to get messed up and leave me with a nasty 9 inch scar? Why did my grades have to suffer in my most important year? I have no idea, but all I know is that it taught me how to persevere through the tough times. I learned hard work, from re-learning how to walk, to doing a month’s worth of school work in a week. I had to be strong and I now know that I can do anything that I put my mind to. Last year was a very hard year for me, but I am proud to say that I got through it.
While I was out of school, I missed work from all of my seven classes. Even though I was in extreme pain, my mother arranged for a few of my teachers to come to my house and tutor me. I worked extremely hard to do all of my assignments, and I was even able to take all of my final exams with the rest of my school. My teachers were amazed at how hard I worked and how I was able to do all of my work. Even though I finished everything on time, my grades were obviously not as good as they could have been if I had been in class. I was even able to take my SATs on my original set date, even if I had to use a walker to go into the class.
I learned so much about myself during the long 6 month process of being on crutches, having surgery, using a walker and then being on crutches again. I learned that pain and suffering makes people stronger. There were so many times that I would wonder if I would be able to deal with everything, but I pushed on and was able to come out stronger. Now when I am going through any challenge, I often remember how hard last year was for me. I know that if I made it through that, I can make it through anything that life throws at me.